Killer here. Sometimes I like to ponder my existence. Why was I sent here to be part queen, part mascot of the home, part babysitter? I like to sit and look out the window, study the birds outside, the people in the other homes, and think about ‘what is the meaning of it all?” I get to sleep right in the middle of a bed big enough for 20 cats, with Egyptian cotton sheets, and a fleece blanket all my own to snuggle up in. I don’t have just 1 bedroom either, there is the day bed on the table for me to have a view of the whole kingdom, and pre-bedtime-nap lounge.
I get as much food as my heart desires. I demand only the best water. It must be filtered and the fountain must be made of pure platinum.
Best of all, I have a maid who cleans up after me. Bathroom and all. I also get a belly scratch whenever I want, and as soon as I’ve had enough I can claw my disciples without any repercussions.
Scout, what do you think about life?
Scout: I’m a cat-cat,
pretty little cat-cat,
I’m a cat-cat,
meow, meow, meow,
Killer: F#@k that stupid cat. I don’t even know why I try.