Pump up the Trends! Episode 2: Hot Yoga

Hot Yoga. They should call it Drowning-in-a-pool-of-your-own-sweat Yoga.

I went into it with a very closed mind. I was going to go, hate it, then write about how terrible it was. For a couple reasons: 1. I hate being hot. 2. I hate saunas and steam rooms. 3. See #1. Then I find out the class is an hour and half. I’m really going to hate this.

But I went anyways because I wanted to get the true experience of it. I arrived at Bikram Yoga NYC. I removed my shoes upon entering and stored my belongings in a locker for free. I go into the room,  it’s already too hot. My heart is pounding in my neck from the heat. I’m regretting coming to this, and thinking there is no way in hell I can survive the entire class.

Then Regina enters the room. She’s tall, thin, has practically no fat on her, and is wearing basically nothing. She’s scary. She goes around the room and asks every single persons name, and somehow remembers them all. She lets the newcomers know that it’s normal to feel dizzy and nauseous, and just to sit a set out. Why, WHY? did I come to this?HotYoga

I can’t remember a single pose we did, but nothing too difficult that a beginner couldn’t do. All I remember was the sweating. I was sweating from every inch of my body. Sweating from places I didn’t know could sweat. Like my forearm. And my shins. We were all covered in sweat from head to toe, dripping onto our towels below us. It wasn’t even all our own sweat. I got a few splash backs from someone whipping their arm, and a couple drops from Regina walking over me.

Around minute 45, I thought, “I can’t do anymore. I have to sit down. I’m going to throw up. I think I’m dying. Is that you God?”

Nope, just drill sergeant, Regina and her rockin’ body, calling me by name with her thick accent, “Zoey, shoulders down.” 

Then it was over. I survived. I have to say, it sweat the hate right out of me. I get why people do it now. I feel like part of the club. I walked home feeling cleaner, lighter, and like every bad thing had left my body. (Except of course my clothes that looked like I just jumped in a pool, good thing it was dark out). Speaking of, I wore a long tank top and capris, which I strongly recommend NOT doing. Less is more. Like sports bra and underwear, less.

So, Go. Sign up for a hot yoga class. It’s worth it.


One thought on “Pump up the Trends! Episode 2: Hot Yoga

  1. You liked it better than I. When I tried to leave the room to get a sip of water the teacher tried to stop me. I basically had to push her out of my way. What, are these people crazy?

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